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Started by : Darshana Sawant, HR Manager, Leading IT services company   01 05 2010 10:42:36 +0000
Industry : Teaching/EducationFunctional Area : India(Markets)
Activity:  312 views;  last activity : 07 30 2010 13:18:38 +0000

The youth are under constant pressure to perform. Be it academically, socially or otherwise, but stress which is a byproduct of popular culture and expectations is killing them literally.

In a recent news, a day after an 18-year-old physiotherapy student committed suicide after failing in 3 out of 6 subjects in her second semester examinations.

And now a 12-year-old Sushant Patil, a seventh standard student of Shardashram School at Dadar also chose to forget failure by ending his life, as he had failed in 4 out of 6 subjects.


http://www.healthnews-stat.com/primages/teen_suicide_copy.jpg

And this fear of failure combined with many other reasons is making life of youth all the more difficult and this has increased suicidal tendencies among youth, but then at the same time parents can't be too much liberal or too much strict for that matter on many occassions, and this is a tricky situation for a parent, like how to handle situations like these, So, would like to know from the users on the platform, how to deal with this suicidal tendency problem among youth? Please do share your views, as it will help in tackling the problem which is taking many young lives.

 
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1 2 3 4 5
1 De-stress them
2 Balance Between Life & Aspirations
3 Don't Compare with others and Realize their worth in their style!!
4 Provide alternate Career Paths and make people realize their self worth.
5 Proper Counseling
6 dont impose parents expectations on them
7 Choose your competiition
8 Interactive communication to develop response to stress
9 Foster an environment of open dialogue at home
10 It Seeems To B A Fashion
11 by enhancing there abilities in which they are good
12 Dont Compare with others and Realize their worth in their life
13 Make them realize that ther are ARYA
14 educate about importance of Life & Values
15 to know the interest & capability of the child
16 Fill the life of young people with spiritual values
17 Worthwhile suggestions; Hope we Walk the Talk

De-stress them

idea posted by Darshana Sawant HR Manager, Leading IT services company

A person feels stressed out due to many reasons and one important reason is due to depression, and among youths its mainly due to peer pressure and exam stress, even we have all been through varying levels of exam stress in our lives. While some stress is desirable for motivating us to do well in our exams, being too stressed out only reverses our productivity and interferes with our performance.

Amazingly, there are some that will fake a suicide attempt to gain attention, this is termed a suicidal gesture. No suicide attempt should be ignored though, it must be viewed as a desperate cry for help. Either way, it is a wake up call for their friends, family, and significant others. These people feel so hopeless and depressed that they want to end their lives. Most of the time, they are not strong enough and do not have the willpower to do so. For some, the only reason they don't kill themselves, is because they do not want to hurt those they leave behind that love them. You have to remember though, with every attempt, they become that much closer in succeeding the next time. They need help and they need it now, because tomorrow will be very late.....

So as a parent please do not force your kids to achieve unachievable things, understand where his good at and let him do that, the current education system is such that they give only importance to the book knowledge and not the talent that kid posseses and even parents put similar pressure, and in the end unable to handle pressure and depression one attempts for suicide....

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by Ameet Ranjan, Regional HR - North India, Maclellan Integrated Services India Pvt Ltd  | 01 12 2010 08:40:03 +0000

Most of the suicide occurs as said by de-stress. Everybody are running behind materialistic things, so by birth, it comes through genes, that you should win at any cost, otherwise, you will treat as failure in the society, this pressure make the people over – stress & cause suicide. Suicide is the result of many complex factors. More than 90% of youth suicide victims have at least one major psychiatric disorder, although younger adolescent suicide victims have lower rates of psychopathology (Gould et al., 2003). It is important to note that while the majority of suicide victims have a history of psychiatric disorder, especially mood disorders, very few adolescents with psychiatric disorder will go on to complete suicide. The suicide rate among young people aged 20-24 was 2.8/100,000, or 2,373 deaths among 18,484,615 people in this age group.

 

Other important risk factors for suicide and suicidal behavior include:

• Prior suicide attempt

• Co-occurring mental and alcohol or substance abuse disorders

• Family history of suicide

• Parental psychopathology

• Hopelessness

• Impulsive and/or aggressive tendencies

• Easy access to lethal methods, especially guns

• Exposure to the suicide of a family member, friend, or other significant person

• History of physical or sexual abuse

• Same-sex sexual orientation (only been shown for suicidal behavior, not suicide)

• Impaired parent-child relationships

• Life stressors, especially interpersonal losses and legal or disciplinary problems

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by sankhe jitendra h., Maintenance manager(electronics & electricals), eden furnishings(vasai(E),thane)  | 01 09 2010 06:19:22 +0000

To de  stress them gov. must have to change system of education.they should introduce something innovative but not boring.

I am also requesting all parents "don't expect from your child beyond theirs limitations

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by Arunangshu Choudhury, Agent, L.I.C  | 01 05 2010 16:11:16 +0000

I agree.Stress is not good for anyone.Parents should not impose the burden of their expectation  on their children.

Add your argument:

Balance Between Life & Aspirations

idea posted by Kashif Billal Training & Induction Manager, H&M Hennes & Mauritz

I think, in todays times there has been Immense Opportunities of Growth & Fame through various Competitions.

 

But one thing we need to understand as Parents& Elders that apart from Success, Failure is also a part of life. And every failure churns out a better Individual out of us.

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by G C Jagadeesan, Retired Client Banker - Corporate Banking, ICICI Bank  | 04 10 2010 01:28:27 +0000

They lack the Art of Balancing their Life and work environment. It is even the ole generations they injected in the mind sets of their children their own ideas and way of life. They fail to show that there is a life beyond WORK. The older ones realise only after their children are grown. As they sow the seed of high aspirations, today the younger one's struggle between the life & aspirations. Have their parents do support them properly with the right guidance and the Act of Balancing it would certainly bring blossoms......

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by Purvi Ghosh, Marketing analyst, Percept Advertising  | 01 06 2010 14:13:41 +0000

Yes there should be balance b/w life & aspirations and today's kids are stressed with many things and parents should make them understand these things, and also the surrounding around a youth should be off from too much pressure, as too much pressure leads to stress and depression as they can't do everything. let them do what they really like.........please elders and parents don't impose too many things on youngsters, let them learn on their own way.......

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by Ranjeet Kumar, Strategic HR Professional  | 01 06 2010 05:47:58 +0000

Curtail desire,aspiration,expectation and increase simplicity in thought,enriched attitude...it will ultimately lead to balance between personal & professional life.....

Add your argument:

Don't Compare with others and Realize their worth in their style!!

idea posted by Manish N Chugh Officer Trainee, Stock Holding Corporation of India ltd.,

The very first thing what today's parent do is COMPARING their child with others child. I Swear....  i feel this is the worst thing they do with their child and make them realize how low they are. Yes, if they do by comparing with others and tell how ahead they are from others, then that would be gr8!! But no, they always compare those talents which they are bad at. No one tries to realize what good talent is there in their child and encourage them to intensify that talent. I feel a child should be realized his talent and be encouraged to gain more depth of the same in which he feels the world is existing..... Thank you, Manish N

Cheers!!

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by Manish N Chugh, Officer Trainee, Stock Holding Corporation of India ltd.,  | 01 07 2010 06:08:40 +0000

Please do watch " 3 Idiots  " .... it gives a right impact to those who believe in comparing their child's attitude with other's in regards to their career!!

Cheers!!

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by kawaljit kaur, pgdbm student , Mount Carmel Institute of Management  | 01 06 2010 16:08:12 +0000

in the wake to intense competition ,parents sometime tend to push their childrens to hard .for parents kid's academic performance ,sports accolades,or career is a status symbol,something that they can flaunt among there peers.every child has own set of capabilities ,parents instead of forcing their kids to do something apart from their usual aptitude ,should encourage their kids to pursue their passion .on a funny knot ..SUICIDE  is a way to tell GOD that you can't fire me ..I QUIT ;)

jokes apart suicide is a COWARDLY act and cannot be justified in any case:)

Add your argument:

Provide alternate Career Paths and make people realize their self worth.

idea posted by Arunangshu Choudhury Agent, L.I.C

Thank you Darshanaji for raising such relevant topics.I feel that one of the main causes of Depression and eventual suicides is THE INABILITY TO IDENTIFY ALTERNATIVES.Suppose the 12year child you talked about,at that stage everything is connected to studies,his friends circle,his school,his parents,his teachers infact his very life would have appeared to have depended upon it.Once he failed,he would have found himself staring into darkness with no hope for the future.But in real life is it that only the most highly educated are successful?No.Teachers and parents need to realize this themselves and tell this to students that education only builds people,it is not everything.There are fantastic opportunities available that dont need an M.B.A or doctorate,and students should not feel depressed if they are not good at it.            The same applies to other aspects of life too,people continue to suffer in bad jobs or broken relationships and when the inevitable happens,they commit suicide.I believe that AS LONG AS A PERSON IS HEALTHY,HE SHOULD NOT LOSE HIS SELF ESTEEM.HE SHOULD BELIEVE THAT HE CAN AND WILL DO GOOD TO OTHERS AND ONLY GOOD THINGS WILL HAPPEN TO THEM.               

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by Kriti Das, HR Manager, ANZ Information Technology  | 01 22 2010 08:21:56 +0000

I agree with arunangshu's idea. The youth should be guided and be provided with alternative careers when they are depressed. And Narayan has explained it more preciously with good examples. I agree with narayanan throughly.......   

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by K. NARAYAN, None, None  | 01 12 2010 05:20:39 +0000

I agree with your argument. I would only like to change your ending words a bit. You have said "As long as one is healthy ..." , I would change that to "As long as one is having life ..." ; to cite an example , just look at Stephen Hawking and how much he has contributed even after his debilitating illness / disease.

So many people become handicapped / disabled through accidents , for no fault of theirs e.g. Christopher Reeve , well-known for his role as Superman ; he is a role model for millions , even after he became a quadriplegic following an accident.

The saying is "you are not a success because you don't fall , you are a success if you manage to get up each time you fall". As parents , teachers and just responsible adults , it is our responsibility to guide children through the journey of life using such inspiring role models.

We forget that children learn to walk and then to run by stumbling the first few times. At that stage of their life , we don't criticise them for falling , instead we coax them to try again , and then applaud them when they succeed. Unfortunately , as our children grow up , we , the parents , also change. We start getting impatient with their failures , and are not willing to take the extra effort and time to motivate them to try again. The result is that children become discouraged and eventually learn to accept failure. This lack of self-belief is the worst lesson that we can teach a child , since chldren , on their own , do not think that anything is impossible.

Add your argument:

Proper Counseling

idea posted by Ashutosh Pandita Sr Business Manager-IT Search, Quadrangle-Infoedge India

I think counseling would we of a great help in these cases.

 

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by albert arul prakash, Product specialist, Consona Software Pvt Limited  | 01 06 2010 15:05:59 +0000

A proper counseling for the parents and the society will help the country to reduce the number of sucides in a year.

We live in a world where we need to be competent. Competent is not like i must be on top or my child must be on top. We need to find our strengths and must excel on that and must be competent. but a society will celebrate a person who is gaining state first or second. They don't even care about those who just pass as average. More over they ridicule about their performance.

Not everyone is superstars only a Amithab bachchan or Rajinikanth can become same way not everyone will be like Kamalahaasan or Amir khan who give varities and take risk in their professionals. Parents and society must understand that. Also the students and the individuals must understand that exams are just to test what you learnt in school/college. It is not the real test for your skills.

if it is the real test for your skills there will never be a Thomas Alva edision or Albert Einstein in this world. Even the world richest(Bill Gates) and the best innovator that the industry (steve Jobs) known are dropouts of school. So just for failing a paper in exam is not the end of the world. There is far more things to learn in this world.

I remember one of my state cheif minister (Kamaraj) who is an illitrate but he is the one who brought poor people to school and created some very good plans to increase the literacy rate of Tamil Nadu. More than that he has respect in the Indian Political Arena.

Have realistic expectations, it will help you to keep destressed. not everyone will earn 10 lakh per minute, only one Ambhani can do that.

Knowing your strengths and working on that and not comparing with others will help to reduce the number of suicides in this country. 

Written by a person who had 21 arrears out of 25 Subjects during my 5th semester and cleared every arrear during 6 semester and completed degree within three years. But my strengths lies in programming and computers which i excelled.

Add your argument:

dont impose parents expectations on them

idea posted by roumi chatterjee asst commercial executive, century plyboard india ltd

In most of the suicidal case,it is seen that parents are over expected from their child.Whatever the things they could'nt able to achieve in their lifetime,they want their child to accomplish it.Which in turn get them into so much of pressure.They become feared with their parents.May some of them are not good in that particular side which their parents are expecting to do,which makes them feel of total failure and this subsequently compell them to commit suiside.

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by maria do carmo de oliveira cid peixeiro, HR Manager, mithogenia unipessoal lda  | 01 05 2010 11:41:33 +0000

in societies in transition / growth / development there is always the danger of the new generations would struggle to adapt to new realities, with the traditional values that were raised.
Education / values that are taught at an early age, are those that prevail for a lifetime. Adapting these concepts to new situations / challenges is hard work and requires an open mind and decided.
In this context the couple is faced with, meet the expectations that the family placed in their future and relidad.
Failure / inadaptidão to do so, leads many people to feel "failed" and then to suicide is one step.
In this matter the sensitivity of the family is fundamental. Growth is very painful and often causes severe insurmountable acquisition strength animica get over and point out ways that do not lead to suicide.

Add your argument:

Choose your competiition

idea posted by Mohammed Design engineer for building services

To grow in any way, we need competition. But anything in excess brings a bad result. Youth, today are in fierce competition to excel comparatively more in negative accomplishments, than the positive ones. A healthy introspection of one's own abilities, skills has become a necessity to choose the competition. Its observed that leadership in any path is a choice. And to lead, you have to know the pros and cons, although one cannot be a master of everything. In a competitive and open world today, competition is also your choice. We have to choose competition according to our own capabilities and skills. Mere copying the success is not the solution. I personally feel, that todays youth lacks patience, persistence and a clear vision to accomplish things. Most of them depends on a series of sparkling success through media which makes them impatient to reach their dream goals as soon as possible. As very well said by Dr.APJ KALAM, a dream is not that you see while you sleep, but a dream is something which doesnt let you sleep. But it is applicable if you focus on only one dream at atime. Todays youth seems to be focussing on multiple dreams at one time and that is resulting in frustration, jealousy, unhealthy relations,crimes and extreme cases of suicide.

Desire to be wealthy through wrong ways is the most dangerous symptom of homicide which involves fake affairs with opposite sex  too. 

I think, in todays age of information, proper managment of information is the key to avert suicides in youth.

In my view, Parents, Mentors, home atmosphere, Religious teachings(all religions teach humanity basically), Professional guidance and care for society, proper ethical practices are the keys to save tomorrows youth  from adapting destructive paths.

let me have other perspectives

THANKs

Mohammed

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Interactive communication to develop response to stress

idea posted by Arun Solomon Director Consulting Services, HumanSync

communicating with individuals to understand their resilience levels and gradually increase ability to cope. This cannot happen only in work situation but also should begin with parents, teachers and others who interact with individuals

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by Gargi Sinha, Senior Consultant, Hewitt Associates  | 02 17 2010 08:00:30 +0000

Arun well said stress is the main factor which increases the tendency of suicide. So when you find people very stressful try to communicate to them and slowly know what causes stress in them. Doing this sometimes will helps us to give a solution for their problem and make them relief.

Thanks...    

Add your argument:

Foster an environment of open dialogue at home

idea posted by Resmi Maxim GENERAL MANAGER - OPERATIONS, SI PROPERTY (KERALA) PVT.LTD.,

Most of the suicides are associated with introvert and self-absorbed behavior. The more intense the sharing of information at home with the dear ones, the more is the level of confidence. Let it be children or parents. Cultivating an atmosphere of open communication assumes importance not only at workplace. The difference between the two situations lies in the time when the need for open communication is identified & started. At workplace, people can be intermittently trained to communicate so as to bridge the official information gaps, whereas at home it should start at the childhood age. This culture is carried forward in a person’s life cycle, which he demonstrates throughout each phase of his life. The impact of being the prisoner of one’s own feelings is much different in a workplace and home!

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It Seeems To B A Fashion

idea posted by Bhavana Menonq B.Com student, All Saints College

i strongly feel dat we shudn even care bt those kids who suicided.@ d age of 18 or 15 what do they noe about life? they r cmpletely unaware bt what life is ... as a teenager i strongly feeell dieng is not a solution for anyting .... am jus concerned bt dose parents whose children had died..

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by Dr. S.Pruthviraja pande, Visiting Professor, Bangalore/Ravenshaw University  | 01 07 2010 06:37:08 +0000

Thanks Bhavana, thanks for your parental concern! truly we are worried about the issue

Add your argument:

by enhancing there abilities in which they are good

idea posted by RAVEESH KUMAR B.Tech/B.E. student, Amity School Of Engineering, Noida

my friends life is a god gift to each one of us....we are here to enjoy it..we face hapiness and dificulties side by side......when we are hapy..no one sees our sadness behind of it...but they accept our smile...and they participate in that....when a person fails somewhere he gets shocked because each n every one is afraid of that but u should know that u r one step near to ur success by ur failure...u enjoy more n more when u have to overcome more more challenges..this is life...face the challenges and get through them dont just demoralize urself that u cant do anything...each n every one in this world is haviing somee goood and bad qualities in itself...rise ur good ones ...not ur bad ones by commiting suicides...kyoki. buudy kuch pane k liye kuch karke to dikhana padega...do more and more hardwork..and then success is there for ur way..to welcome u..thanx

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by Leena Pawar, Tech Architect, IT Infotech  | 02 04 2010 13:28:38 +0000

Raveesh I agree with you. We should find their abilities and encourage them in that field. Only when we enhance them in their own interest, they will be successful.  

Good explanation friend ........ 

Add your argument:

Dont Compare with others and Realize their worth in their life

idea posted by Rupesh Mainkar Asst. Manager/Manager -(Key Accounts- Business Support), RentWorks

How far and since how long is a 18 and a 15 year student running this race of life? Life! what do they know about it. Suicide! what do they know about it and how did they get this Idea at this age? Success, Failure, competition, who teaches them all this? or they learn by themselves? the ans is no they don't know anything at that age. We teach them. They are forced to enter the competition. And when they are not interested they are been compared with other students. The feeling is as insecure as you and me must have experienced at least once in the whole life time when our Girlfriend/Boyfriend or the people whom we love the most is actually praising some 1 else. Moreover we are also compared for no reason. every 1 has 1 unique quality in them. No 1 is dumb or no 1 has a 0 IQ. Every 1 excels in some or the other field. The only thing we need is time to realize our line of interest. Students should never be forced but they should themselves enter the competition.

                      Considering the fact that some students are very stubborn and notorious but if they are guided properly their own nature will lead them to success. Especially parents should take care of this. We should stop grading students on the basis of their marks in Math and Science. No 1 scores highest in all the subjects. The same way we cant run on every race course.

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by rahul p rinayat, Software Developer, Geometric Solution  | 07 30 2010 09:36:24 +0000

I am hundred % agree with you. we are competing with whom? one side we say all Indians are my brother & sister & other side we are trying to defeat one another? we must think on it. our culture is be fit & make unfit fit to survive.

Add your argument:

Make them realize that ther are ARYA

idea posted by rahul p rinayat Software Developer, Geometric Solution

What student are doing is because of low thinking.Let Them know they are descendant of ARYA SANSKRIT. Arya never gives up Hi fights with even death .They are able to defeat it. Then How can small problem make them frustrate. This is the only solution nothing can work out better than this

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educate about importance of Life & Values

idea posted by Dr. S.Pruthviraja pande Visiting Professor, Bangalore/Ravenshaw University

Sadly i should say either in our system of education or at home we teach very less to the youth regarding the life, its importance, purpose of life, values and other moral education to empower our youth, today, the youth is not able to face a small failure or difficulty which drags them to commit suicide which they think is an answer for their problem in question, but let me put it, the suicide is not at all a solution for problems of any magnitude under the sun!!

good content dear, thanks for referral,

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to know the interest & capability of the child

idea posted by Mohit Trivedi Game Developer in Emantras

More important for parents to know the interest and capability of their child.Because if a person choose  career in his/her field, he/she will certainly do better.

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Fill the life of young people with spiritual values

idea posted by Pedro Gonzalez Lopez Advance Quality Engineer, Alps Electric

I would suggest to teach young people to reapect for life, in all its expressiona, and especially their own lives. Show them that all of us have a mission to complete, a reason we come to life. And alway remind them that they are not real failures, there is always an opportunity to come back and succed.

If the young people commit suicide it is because adults have not been able to provide them with a life with values like the one we receive from pass generations.

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by rahul p rinayat, Software Developer, Geometric Solution  | 07 30 2010 09:32:43 +0000

You are correct sir, we should try to make children more mentally strong & of will to live tendency rather than will to die

Add your argument:

Worthwhile suggestions; Hope we Walk the Talk

idea posted by Shiuli Mukherji Head Strategy Plan- , Region SEA

 

Darshana, very good topic and all the suggestions contributed are worthwhile. I hope and pray that We Walk the Talk.

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