An annotated Thermometer by Don Haugen
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    +60 F (+15 C)  Californians put on sweaters (if they can find one
    in their wardrobe!).

    +50 F (+10 C)  Miami residents turn on the heat.

    +40 F (+5 C)  You can see your breath.  Californians shiver
    uncontrollably. Minnesotans go swimming.

    +35 F (+2 C)  Italian cars don't start.

    +32 F (0 C)  Water freezes.

    +30 F (-1 C)  You plan your vacation to Australia.
    Minnesotans put on t-shirts.  Politicians begin to worry about
    the homeless.  English cars don't start.

    +25 F (-4 C)  Boston water freezes.  Californians weep
    pitiably.  Minnesotans eat ice cream.  Canadians go
    swimming.

    +20 F (-7 C)  You can hear your breath.  Politicians begin to
    talk about the homeless.  New York City water freezes.
    Miami residents plan vacations further south.

    +15 F (-10 C)  French cars don't start.  You plan a vacation in
    Mexico.  Your cat insists on sleeping in bed with you.

    +10 F (-12 C)  Too cold to ski.  You need jumper cables to get
    the car going.

    +5 F (-15 C)  You plan your vacation in Houston.  American
    cars don't start.

    +0 F (-18 C)  Alaskans put on t-shirts.  Too cold to skate.

     -10 F (-23 C).  German cars don't start.  Eyes freeze shut
    when you blink.

     -15 F (-26 C)  You can cut your breath and use it to build an
    igloo. Arkansans stick tongue on metal objects.  Miami
    residents cease to exist.

     -20 F (-30 C)  Cat insists on sleeping in your pajamas with
    you.  Politicians actually do something about the homeless.
    Minnesotans shovel snow off roof. Japanese cars don't start.

     -25 F (-32 C)  Too cold to think.  You need jumper cables to
    get the driver going.

     -30 F (-34 C)  You plan a two-week hot bath.  The mighty
    Monongahela freezes. Swedish cars don't start.

     -40 F (-40 C)  Californians disappear.  Minnesotans button top
    button. Canadians put on sweaters.  Your car helps you plan
    your trip south.

     -50 F (-46 C)  Congressional hot air freezes.  Alaskans close
    the bathroom window.

     -80 F (-62 C)  Hell freezes over.  Polar bears move south.

     -90 F (-68 C)  Lawyers put their hands in their own pockets.